Sweet Revenges

Sometimes we want to revenge on those who had committed injustice on us. But I used to think about another kind of revenge. The best revenge is forgiveness. When our enemy was expecting and preparing for our sever revenge, the sweetest revenge may be not only forgiveness but do something good on our enemy. In this way, we could avoid the never ending chain of revenge and retaliations. Who knows, we could even “brainwash” or “turn-over” our enemies into our good friends.

“An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.”
Mahatma Gandhi

“Grudges are for those who insist that they are owed something; forgiveness, however, is for those who are substantial enough to move on.”
Criss Jami, Salomé: In Every Inch In Every Mile

“The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury.”
Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

“When you begin a journey of revenge, start by digging two graves: one for your enemy, and one for yourself.”
Jodi Picoult, Nineteen Minutes

“Anger, resentment and jealousy doesn’t change the heart of others– it only changes yours.”
Shannon L. Alder, 300 Questions to Ask Your Parents Before It’s Too Late
“If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you’re allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.”
Shannon L. Alder

How to Forgive

One of the thorniest and most difficult things we humans are ever called upon to do is to respond to evil with kindness, and to forgive the unforgivable. We love to read stories about people who have responded to hatred with love, but when that very thing is demanded of us personally, our default seems to be anger, angst (dread or anguish), depression, self-righteousness, hatred, etc. Yet study after study shows that one of the keys to longevity and good health is to develop a habit of gratitude and let go of past hurts.

Want to live a long, happy life? Forgive the unforgivable. It really is the kindest thing you can do for yourself. Your enemy may not deserve to be forgiven for all the pain and sadness and suffering purposefully inflicted on your life, but you deserve to be free of this evil. As Ann Landers often said, “hate is like an acid. It damages the vessel in which it is stored, and destroys the vessel on which it is poured.”

!. Realize that the hate you feel toward your adversary does not harm him or her in the way that you want.

2. Understand that the best revenge against your enemies is to live a successful and happy life.

3. Realize that the second best revenge is to turn the evil into something good, to find the proverbial silver lining in the dark cloud.

4. Make a list of the good things that emerged as a result of this awful experience.

Stop telling “the story.

Read all here @ How to Forgive

Forgiveness is the scent that the rose leaves on
the heel that crushes it.

John Arnott

This is certain, that a man that studieth revenge keeps
his wounds green, which otherwise would heal and do well.

Josiah Bailey

I can forgive, but I cannot forget” is only another way of saying, “I will not forgive.”
Forgiveness ought to be like a canceled note–torn in two and burned up so that it never can be shown against one.

 

Paul Boese

Forgiveness does not change the past, but it
does enlarge the future.

Les Brown

Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes
and move on.

E. H. Chapin

Never does the human soul appear so strong as when is foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.

Confucius 

As forgiveness allows love to return to my awareness, I will see a world 
of peace and safety and joy.

It is said: “to err is human and to forgive is divine.” Both parts of this statement are very true. As human beings we are responsible, but we do also make mistakes and we are constantly in need of forgiveness. Islam speaks about two elements of forgiveness: a) God’s forgiveness; b) Human forgiveness. We need both, because we do wrong in our relations to God as well as in our relations to each other.  

 

God’s Forgiveness

There are many names of God given in the Quran. They are called “Most Beautiful Names” and they indicate many different and diverse attributes and qualities of God. Some of these names are related to His mercy and forgiveness. Let us look at some of these names:

1. Al-Ghafoor: The Most Forgiving. This name occurs in the Quran more than seventy times. There are other names from the same root, such as Ghafir and Ghaffar. The meaning of the Arabic word “ghafara” is to cover, to hide and from it comes the meaning “to excuse,” “to pardon,” “to remit” and “to forgive.” God does all these things. In the Quran, it is mentioned that God does not forgive the Shirk (without repentance) but He may forgive every other sin for whomsoever He wills. (Al-Nisa’ 4:116) We must turn to God to seek His forgiveness.

2. Al-‘Afuw: This has another part of forgiveness. This name occurs in the Quran five times. Literally the word ‘Afw means “to release,” “to heal.”“to restore, to remit.” Thus in relation to God it means “to release us from the burden of punishment due to our sins and mistakes,” “to restore our honor after we have dishonored ourselves by committing sins and making mistakes.” Sometimes in the Quran both names: ‘Afuw and Ghafoor come together.

3. Al-Tawwab: The Acceptor of Repentance. This name of God is mentioned in the Quran about 11 times. God accepts the repentance of those who sincerely repent and turn to him. The word “tawwab” gives the sense of “oft-returning” which means that God again and again accepts the repentance. We make sins and mistakes then we repent, He accepts our repentance. Then again we commit sins and make mistakes and when we repent, He again very kindly accepts us and gives us another chance.

4. Al-Haleem: The Clement. This name is mentioned fifteen times in the Quran. This means that God is not quick to judgment. He gives time. He forebears and is patient to see His servant return to Him.

5. Al-Rahman and Al-Rahim: The Most Merciful and Compassionate. These names are the most frequent in the Quran. Al-Rahman is mentioned 57 times and al-Raheem is mentioned 115 times. Al-Rahman indicates that God’s mercy is abundant and plenty and Al-Raheem indicates that this is always the case with God. God is full of love and mercy and is ever Merciful.

Human Forgiveness in Islam

Just as it is important to believe in God’s mercy and forgiveness, it is also necessary to base human relations on forgiveness. We cannot expect God’s forgiveness unless we also forgive those who do wrong to us. Forgiving each other, even forgiving one’s enemies is one of the most important of Islamic teaching. In the Quran God has described the Believers as: {those who avoid major sins and acts of indecencies and when they are angry they forgive.}(Al-Shura 42:37)

Later in the same chapter God says: {The reward of the evil is the evil thereof, but whosoever forgives and makes amends, his reward is upon God} (Al-Shura 42: 40) In another place the Quran says: {If you punish, then punish with the like of that wherewith you were afflicted. But if you endure patiently, indeed it is better for the patient. Endure you patiently. Your patience is not except through the help of God…} (Al-Nahl 16:126-27)

In one the famous sayings of the Prophet (peace be upon him) it is reported that he said that God commanded him about nine things. One of them he mentioned was “that I forgive those who do wrong to me.”

Read all here @ The Power of Forgiveness: An Islamic Perspective

 By Dr. Muzammil H. Siddiqi

Verses of the Qur’an about forgiveness

Whether you reveal a good act or keep it hidden, or pardon an evil act, Allah is Ever-Pardoning, All-Powerful. (Surat An-Nisa, 149)

 

Make allowances for people, command what is right, and turn away from the ignorant. (Surat Al-A‘raf, 199)

 

That is so. And if anyone inflicts an injury the same as the one done to him and then is again oppressed, Allah will come to his aid. Allah is All-Pardoning, Ever-Forgiving. (Surat Al-Hajj, 60)

 

Those of you possessing affluence and ample wealth should not make oaths that they will not give to their relatives and the very poor and those who have made hijra in the way of Allah.* They should rather pardon and overlook. Would you not love Allah to forgive you? Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat An-Nur, 22)

 

The repayment of a bad action is one equivalent to it. But if someone pardons and puts things right,      his reward is with Allah. Certainly He does not love wrongdoers. (Surat Ash-Shura, 40)

Allah does not impose on any self any more than it can stand. For it is what it has earned; against it, what it has merited. Our Lord, do not take us to task if we forget or make a mistake! Our Lord, do not place on us a load like the one You placed on those before us! Our Lord, do not place on us a load we have not the strength to bear! And pardon us; and forgive us; and have mercy on us. You are our Master , so help us against the people of the kafirun. (Surat Al-Baqara, 286)

Those of you who turned their backs on the day the two armies clashed – it was Shaytan who made them slip for what they had done. But Allah has pardoned them. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, All-Forbearing. (Surat Al ‘Imran, 155)

 

It may well be that Allah will pardon them. Allah is Ever-Pardoning, Ever-Forgiving. (Surat An-Nisa, 99)

 

The People of the Book will ask you to bring down a Book from heaven to them. They asked Musa for even more than that. They said, ‘Let us see Allah with our own eyes.’ So the lightning-bolt struck them down for their wrongdoing. Then they adopted the Calf after the Clear Signs had come to them, but We pardoned them for that and gave Musa clear authority. (Surat An-Nisa, 153)

 

But because of their breaking of their covenant, We have cursed them and made their hearts hard. They distort the true meaning of words and have forgotten a good portion of what they were reminded of. You will never cease to come upon some act of treachery on their part, except for a few of them. Yet pardon them, and overlook. Allah loves good-doers. (Surat Al-Ma’ida, 13)

 

You who believe! do not ask about matters which, if they were made known to you, would make things difficult for you. If you do ask about them when the Qur’an is being sent down, they will be made known to you. Allah has ignored them. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, All-Forbearing. (Surat Al-Ma’ida, 101)

 

Allah pardon you! Why did you excuse them until it was clear to you which of them were telling the truth and until you knew the liars? (Surat At-Tawba, 43)

 

It is He Who accepts repentence from His servants and pardons evil acts and knows what they do. (Surat Ash-Shura, 25)

 

Any disaster that strikes you is through what your own hands have earned and He pardons much. (Surat Ash-Shura, 30)

 

Or He wrecks them for what they have earned though He pardons much. (Surat Ash-Shura, 34)

 

Those of you who divorce your wives by equating them with your mothers, they are not your mothers.Your mothers are only those who gave birth to you. What you are saying is wrong and a slanderous lie.But Allah is Ever-Pardoning, Ever-Forgiving. (Surat Al-Mujadala, 2)

 

You who believe! some of your wives and children are an enemy to you, so be wary of them.But if you pardon and exonerate and forgive,Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat At-Taghabun, 14)

FORGIVING
 

Those are the people who will have blessings and mercy from their Lord; they are the ones who are guided. (Surat Al-Baqara, 157)

 

Your God is One God. There is no god but Him, the All-Merciful, the Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 163)

 

He has only forbidden you carrion, blood and pork and what has been consecrated to other than Allah. But anyone who is forced to eat it – without desiring it or going to excess in it – commits no crime. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 173)

 

Those are the ones who have sold guidance for misguidance and forgiveness for punishment. How steadfastly they will endure the Fire! (Surat Al-Baqara, 175)

 

You who believe! retaliation is prescribed for you in the case of people killed: free man for free man, slave for slave, female for female. But if someone is absolved by his brother, blood-money should be claimed with correctness and paid with good will. That is an easement and a mercy from your Lord. Anyone who goes beyond the limits after this will receive a painful punishment. (Surat Al-Baqara, 178)

 

But if someone fears bias or wrongdoing on the part of the person making the will, and puts things right between the people involved, in that case he has not committed any crime. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 182)

 

On the night of the fast it is lawful for you to have sexual relations with your wives. They are clothing for you and you for them. Allah knows that you have been betraying yourselves and He has turned towards you and excused you. Now you may have sexual intercourse with them and seek what Allah has written for you. Eat and drink until you can clearly discern the white thread from the black thread of the dawn, then fulfil the fast until the night appears. But do not have sexual intercourse with them while you are in retreat in the mosques. These are Allah’s limits, so do not go near them. In this way does Allah make His Signs clear to people so that hopefully they will have taqwa. (Surat Al-Baqara, 187)

 

But if they cease, Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 192)

 

Then press on from where the people press on and ask Allah’s forgiveness. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 199)

 

Those who believe and make hijra and do jihad in the Way of Allah can expect Allah’s mercy. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 218)

 

Allah will not take you to task for inadvertent statements in your oaths, but He will take you to task for the intention your hearts have made. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, All-Forbearing. (Surat Al-Baqara, 225)

 

Those who swear to abstain from sexual relations with their wives can wait for a period of up to four months. If they then retract their oath, Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surat Al-Baqara, 226)

 

 

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